J. D. proclaimed,”He got more votes than me, so he deserves the job.”

From all of us at OKPNS, we’re really gonna miss this guy.

Soon to be ex-Republican J.D. Johnston performed better than expected
in the Republican runoff election for Oklahoma County Commissioner
District 2 tonight.

The ex-mayor who sold his political soul and lost a fortune to idiot
campaign consultants got nearly 30% of the vote, silencing the critics
who thought J.D. would get only 1%.

Final tally: Brian Maughan 71%, the “geniuses” 29%.

Who was it said, “A fool and his money are easily parted?” J.D. Johnston’s campaign consultants!

Word is that Mike Turpen will emcee the Oklahoma Academy Salute on August 22nd in Tulsa along with Frank Keating. But don’t write the evening off just yet, although the snooze factor will be high considering who will be at the podium, The Capitol Steps will be in the house making for a truly entertaining evening!

I am Press I Guess

I am Press I Guess

Can you Guess if I am Press?

Press I Guess, I wonder why,

You let old Dirty Harry lie?

Don’t you like my Harry Coates?

I Love my Coates, on him I dotes.

But Randy Terrill, gets my goats!

About that Harry’s missing wrapper?

Of course he left them in the crapper.

In a plain manilla wrapper.

We knew it soon would be a mess,

but you know we are Press I Guess.

As Press I Guess we’re in the bag,

with Harry’s tale, we do not gag,

His docs were hacked, hacked we say!

Don’t let the facts get in the way,

And we won’t check that story out,

We’ll never, ever, have no doubt!

We will not write about his lies

We’d never ever be so wise,

We’ll never ask for the cop’s report,

If the truth comes out, would that be sport?

We’re Press I Guess, the verdict’s in,

We know his story’s pretty thin,

but dogging Harry is a sin,

We’re Press I Guess, believe OUR spin.

So Press I Guess,

How will you stop this Harry mess?

We’ll keep looking the other way,

ignore, refuse to ever play,

Inspector Clouseau would be proud,

of how our silence speaks so loud.

We won’t ask for the security tape,

for then our Harry could not escape!

The probe it ended ’cause Harry’s true,

the cost too much for me and you,

we’ll never ask, ‘o the cost, how much?’

We’re Press I Guess, so out of touch.

We’re Press I Guess, If we did our job,

we’d have old Harry by the knob,

We’re MSM, our mission true:

To help keep Harry snowing you!

But now come blogs, they want the facts!

They think that Harry’s lines doth smack,

of lies and phony insinuations,

they care not of our fascination

with Harry and his bumbling crew,

How dare they tell the truth to you!

We’re Press I Guess,

and here’s the deal,

we’ll never make our Harry squeal,

we’ll let him lie, and preen and strut,

and stay here on our lazy butt!

…and the ‘Coates Calamity’ continues

Our Buddy Jimmie Martin over at Oklahoma Opinions has started a new blog called “Breaking Future News.” It is a much needed satirical sabbatical from the daily news of murder, mayhem, and our elected officials who no longer feel they need to pay attention to us. Martin describes his new venture as “a look at present trends and individuals and a wild guess at future news events!” He even takes a shot at himself by proclaiming, “misspelings and gramatical errors are a signature literary techinque of the blogmaster.”

Here is a sample of what you’ll find on the site. Enjoy!

Marriage Declared Illegal

In a close vote the Senate of the United States passed the “Marriage Annulment Act of 2012″ today which prohibits future marriages and declares those presently in place annulled. The bill was sponsored by a consortium of groups including the ACLU, UN Commission on the family, Planned Parenthood, labor groups and the NEA.

In a prepared statement the executive committee of the NEA, speaking for the consortium said that irreparable harm is being done to single parent children. “It is just not fair for some to have two parents and we must level the playing field so that one parent children will have the same self respect and monetary benefits that double parent members enjoy.

FEMA has been instructed to provide mobile homes to the fathers who must move out of the two parent homes. Same sex couples were exempted from the provisions of the bill.President Hillary R. Clinton favors the bill as does United Nations Secretary Bill Clinton who was the principle author.